Parenting Contents Archive

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11 months ago

(Feb 13, 2021 07:18)

This master manipulator will keep me up all night then look like this in the morning.

Reply count

19

Upvote count

1,1K

Downvote count

100% up

11 months ago

(Feb 13, 2021 04:57)

My middle son is too silly in class and distracts others. He’s literally me as a child 👹👿 but I don’t tell him that

Reply count

13

Upvote count

396

Downvote count

100% up

11 months ago

(Feb 13, 2021 09:05)

At least we will be able to tell them apart!

Reply count

21

Upvote count

121

Downvote count

100% up

11 months ago

(Feb 13, 2021 04:50)

Momma Bear Got Him Good!! Follow nottheworstmom

Reply count

517

Like count

17,6K

11 months ago

(Feb 13, 2021 09:11)

Me: I just want to radiate peace and positive vibes 🥰 Also me: *steps on a toy* Mother fucking piece of shit asshole toys

Retweet count

153

Like count

888

11 months ago

(Feb 13, 2021 08:35)

Is this how everyone else convinces kids to get dressed? Here's a brief list of things that are easier to do than getting the twins to wear anything other than. PJs: giving an anal examine to a nervous tiger whilst blindfolded, eating a porcupine whole, working out how bitcoin actually works, Convincing an octopus that they are actually a women in their mid 40's. I could go on. During this pandemic, the need to get properly dressed has gone the way of the dodo, so now the only way I can convince them that garms are good idea is by: promising TV time, doing throws to the moon (no this is not photoshop), reading a book is a stupid voice that makes my throat horse, giving them nutella at 15 minute intervals all day & generally chasing them around with clothes until they're wrestled to the ground & promptly kick me in the face. Is this just a problem in my house hold or do all kids just wear PJS 24/7 now? #putsomedamnclotheson #PJsforlife #parenting #fod #dadlife

Reply count

199

Like count

12,1K

11 months ago

(Feb 13, 2021 05:11)

We stopped at McDonald's to get McFlurrys and the machine was broken. As we pulled away I said, "Shoulda guessed." And I heard a tiny voice from the back say, "Sometimes you gotta let that shit go." So if anyone needs a life coach...

Retweet count

44

Like count

624

11 months ago

(Feb 13, 2021 01:11)

My daughter was playing “princess” with her dolls and when the prince came to see the princess she said, “give me a true love’s cake” and if that isn’t a whole vibe, I don’t know what is.

Retweet count

20

Like count

218

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