my little jack would have been born this week so I'm a bit off. I truly feel kicks in my belly, but it's not phantom. I have surgery for endometriosis tomorrow...but the period feeling this month is exactly like baby kicks. sigh.
With all the favorite-things goodies I’m sending to friends who are about to be parents, the mail man must think I’m running a small baby shop from inside my house.
me, sharing story of getting screwed over by a waiter. shares story of rough week, baby would have been born. feeling anxious, sad. you: let's fucking own this rich bitch for retweets
hey, not everything I say on my twitter is going to be relatable to you because it is my life and my twitter and my stories. I see your tweets, I get your jokes, you are so funny, yes, you really nailed me
one time john and I were at a restaurant and the waiter recommended a nice Cabernet. We got the bill and it was 13,000 dollars. HOW DO U CASUALLY RECOMMEND THAT WINE. we didn’t even finish it and it had been cleared!!!
worst nightmare https://t.co/4Vw0JMyzOi
look at this 😩 I’ll pretend it’s him saying hi - it never stops. https://t.co/5FKSE3g8cG
honestly, I will be that person for you. it is fun to gang up on me. I *see* the convos that bring you together in your owning of me. I make it easy. have fun.
what’s the most expensive thing you’ve eaten that you thought sucked?
When the top half of my face is freezing in NYC, but the lower half thinks it’s on vacation in the hot and humid Florida sun ❄️🌞 https://t.co/uk34AHsJEc